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Women and the hard-to-get game: What men should know

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Winning a woman’s heart is an art that many men across the world are yet to satisfactorily master.

Pick-up lines have to be well-thought out, and remember that expensive coffee dates are never a guarantee of success when pursuing a lady.

Mr man, know that if she looks gorgeous before your eyes, then other men too are clearly seeing her beauty. Only the witty, confident and humorous man would emerge victorious at the end of the day.

You might be thinking she is playing hard-to-get, maybe, she is; maybe, she is not!

Regardless where she lies, there is a reason for either behavior.

And even as you put your best foot forward – ready to add all the bells and whistles to your personality in order to win her heart –, know that you should never portray your interest 100 per cent, especially when it is at that stage when you are just getting to know her.

Adopt a mechanism where you distract yourself from constantly thinking about her, and prioritising her over you and your needs.

Once she realises that you have fallen head over heels for her, she could deliberately play hard to get.

Actually, you would have triggered her to activate the “play hard-to-get mode”. And, I am certain you wouldn’t want to play the long and winding cat and mouse chase.

Nonetheless, there are women who act hard to get in a bid to protect their hearts; and, according to me, this reason is valid. Remember, there are so many heart-crushers disguising as “good men” out here!

Besides the above logic, below are other reasons why women play the hard ball.

-To test a man’s level of interest-

A woman wants to know if a man is serious in his pursuit, or is just taking her on a ride right from the onset. “A man can show you everything you want to see so that he gets what he wants”, says radio personality Mike Mondo.  Separating a genuine man from the likes of “Brayo” and “Kevos” of this world is back-breaking, but quite necessary to keep heartbreaks at bay. 

-To put you on the chase-

She could be interested in you, but again the women’s thumb rule dictates that her interest in you shouldn’t be too obvious. So, what happens? She ensures she has you chasing for her for close to eternity before she, eventually, gives in. But, when she does, you will surely love the voyage!

-To buy time so as to know you better-

The hard ball allows a woman to know: who you are exactly, your temperament, what you do for a living, your rural home, your love history (quite hard to know in some cases), your interests and dislikes, among others.

If she meets you on a Monday, and says ‘yes’ to you on Monday, chances are astronomically high that she hardly knows a tenth of who you are. So, a well-put-together woman, would play hard to get as she gathers satisfactory information about you before she chooses to say ‘yes’ or ‘no’ to your relationship request.

-To weigh her options-

Suitors will always come around a woman despite her looks, intelligence or personality. So, yes, we get spoilt for choice. A woman will evaluate the strengths and weaknesses of each man interested in her before settling on one whom she will get into a relationship with.

-Because she doesn’t like you-

If she doesn’t like you, and doesn’t have the courage to tell you ‘no’, her safest and, perhaps, the most effective method to ward off your pursuit is by playing very, very hard to get! Oh, boy, you won’t win this one; you simply can’t.

Watch a conversation about women and the hard-to-get game below. The discussion aired on K24 Alfajiri on Thursday, June 27.

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