I gave up trying to be liked: Chiki Kuruka on finding happiness at 38
By Valerian Khakayi, September 3, 2026Choreographer and dancer Chiki Kuruka has opened up about choosing happiness and authenticity over seeking approval from others as she marked her 38th birthday.
Chiki celebrated her birthday on Wednesday, September 2, 2026, using the milestone to reflect on how her outlook on life has changed over the years.
In an emotional message, Chiki revealed that she stopped worrying about being liked while still in high school and instead chose to focus on being happy and living a decent life.
“I gave up trying to be ‘liked’ in high school and instead put my focus on being happy and being decent,” she said.
Looking back at the decision, Chiki described it as one of the best choices she has made in her 38 years.
“I’ve found in my 38 years of life that single-handed decision to be the best I’ve ever made,” she wrote.
According to Chiki, choosing not to seek approval from everyone has allowed her to redirect her energy towards people who genuinely matter to her.
“It means I don’t actually care about so much that burdens other people and instead allows me to put ALL my energy behind humans who I love and respect and who love and respect me in return, without the need to drag along those who clearly don’t,” she explained.
Her reflections also appeared to be shaped by the messages she received from people celebrating her birthday.
Chiki noted that the messages came from people across different backgrounds, something she said reassured her that she had made the right choices in life.
“Getting messages today from a wide range of backgrounds – economic, gender, sexual orientation, race, and ability level – makes me realise I’ve done SOMETHING right,” she said.
The choreographer expressed gratitude to everyone who took time to celebrate her milestone and send her messages.
“Thank you ALL for the love. I don’t take a single message or voice note for granted,” she added.
Chiki embraces her new chapter
Chiki, who is married to musician Bien-Aimé Baraza of Sauti Sol, has built a career in dance and choreography while also managing aspects of her husband’s career.
Her 38th birthday reflections offered a glimpse into the personal philosophy she has embraced, one centred on happiness, self-acceptance and surrounding herself with people who reciprocate love and respect.
Rather than measuring her life by how many people approve of her, Chiki appears to be entering 38 with a renewed appreciation for authenticity, meaningful relationships and the freedom to live on her own terms.