Mkamburi Chigogo: Polygamy isn’t cheating, men warn you from day one
By Paulette Mboga, September 10, 2025Radio personality Mkamburi Chigogo has started a heated debate with her recent take on relationships, particularly on how women interpret men’s intentions when it comes to marriage and fidelity.
Speaking on Instagram on Wednesday, September 10, 2025, she insisted that most men are upfront about who they are and what they want, yet women often choose to ignore those signals.
According to Chigogo, men usually reveal their stand from the very beginning of a relationship, but women tend to “edit” those truths to fit their own expectations. She argues that the problem is not dishonesty from men, but selective hearing from women who fail to take men at their word.
She gave the example of men openly expressing their interest in polygamy or their desire to marry more than one wife once they become financially stable. For her, this is not cheating, but honesty in its rawest form. “When a man tells you that one day he could add another wife, he is not lying. He is preparing you for his reality. The issue comes in when women dismiss these statements, assuming that love will change him,” she said.
Women ignoring red flags
Chigogo’s remarks highlight a recurring tension in relationships: the gap between what men say and what women choose to hear. She notes that a man who later marries a second wife or pursues another relationship often faces accusations of betrayal, even though he might have been clear about his intentions from the very beginning.
“Kwa mfano mtu akikwambia, mimi nikipata pesa naweza ongeza mke wa pili, mimi napenda mambo ya polygamy. Nikipata pesa….huyo amekuambia ukweli yake Wewe uko hapo unacheka cheka ukisema haiwezekani, si ako na mimi. Na, someone is being honest. Mwishowe anakupiga direct kwamba kuna mtu anataka aoe. Unaanza kujam, na huyu mtu alishakuambia, ” Chigogo said.
In her view, polygamy should not always be equated with cheating. Instead, women need to confront the fact that men sometimes declare their preferences long before conflicts arise. Failing to take these declarations seriously, she adds, is what creates unnecessary heartbreak.
Her message is a call for women to listen more attentively and accept men’s words as they are. For critics, however, it risks justifying behaviour that undermines trust and commitment in relationships.