Why more women say modern men want to be chased too
By Paulette Mboga, May 13, 2026In the traditional script of romance, men were the pursuers and women the pursued.
However, relationships today are very different from what they looked like years ago. In the past, men were often expected to make the first move, lead conversations, plan dates and chase women until a relationship became serious. Now, many women feel those roles are slowly changing.
Across social media and everyday conversations, more women are joking that modern men also want “princess treatment.” While most of it is said humorously, the conversation has started a serious debate about changing relationship expectations. Many women now say they are meeting men who want constant reassurance, emotional attention and effort from women from the very beginning.
Some women say dating now feels like both people are waiting to be pursued at the same time. Instead of one person leading, there is now more emotional back and forth, with men also wanting to feel wanted, valued and chased.
Changing dating expectations
Modern relationships are becoming more emotionally open than before. Men today are more comfortable expressing feelings, asking for affection and wanting emotional support from their partners. While many people see this as healthy emotional growth, others feel the balance has shifted too much.
Some women say they are surprised by how much emotional effort men now expect in dating. From wanting long, good morning texts to asking for reassurance and attention, many women feel men are no longer hiding their emotional needs like previous generations did.
Others believe this change is happening because society now allows men to express vulnerability more freely. Years ago, men were often taught to appear emotionally strong and distant. Today, many are more open about loneliness, anxiety and the need for affection.
Social media and modern romance
Social media has also played a huge role in changing dating culture. Relationship advice online often encourages people to demand emotional effort, communication and validation from partners. As a result, both men and women are now expecting more attention in relationships.
Many women online joke that modern men want to be chased, spoiled and emotionally comforted in ways traditionally associated with women. Memes about men wanting flowers, sweet messages and constant checking in have become common across platforms.
At the same time, some men argue that wanting emotional care should not be seen as a weakness. They believe relationships should involve equal effort from both people instead of placing all emotional expectations on women alone.
New relationship balance
The conversation around modern men and relationships continues to grow because dating itself is changing. Traditional gender roles are becoming less strict, and many couples are creating their own rules about love, communication and effort.
While some women feel exhausted by emotionally demanding relationships, others appreciate men who openly communicate their feelings instead of hiding them. In the end, the debate shows that modern dating is no longer following old patterns.